How to Cope with Being Laid Off
Post author: Spencer Scott, Psy.D.
The current COVID-19 pandemic has caused unprecedented changes to our everyday lives. For 26.5 million Americans, that’s unfortunately involved loss of employment. Being laid off is an incredibly stressful experience, with research from Holmes and Rahe showing job loss to be the eighth most stressful event you could possibly face in life.
Being laid off is an incredibly stressful experience, with research showing job loss as the eighth most stressful event you could face in life.
Being laid off often causes a ripple effect of uncertainty, leading you to question many facets of your life as you’ve known it. You may be asking: What do I do now? How will I pay my bills? What does this mean for my family? How does this impact my living situation?
During this period of high stress, we can borrow principles from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy to help us weather the storm. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy teach us to accept what is out of our control and commit to actions that enrich our lives. It allows us to balance acceptance of the thoughts and feelings that may be associated with job loss, while also committing to taking actions that face the challenge.
“Acceptance and Commitment” allows us to balance acceptance of the thoughts and feelings that may be associated with job loss, while also committing to taking actions that face the challenge.
Acceptance: Acknowledge your thoughts and feelings.
Take a moment to acknowledge the sadness, anger, uncertainty, frustration, disappointment, etc. that you may be feeling right now. Use the “Leaves on a Stream” exercise above to guide you in simply acknowledging the thoughts and feelings, allowing them to float by without judgment.
2. Commitment: Address your finances
If you’ve been laid off, you should immediately file for unemployment. Experts estimate that it will take 2-3 weeks after filing for unemployment before receiving your first payment, so it’s important to do this immediately. Here’s California’s Employment Development Department.
Consider revisiting your personal budget. Are there any areas of your life where you could decrease expenses? Apps like Mint will allow you to view your current spending levels by category and receive recommendations to adjust your spending accordingly.
3. Acceptance: Allow yourself to be vulnerable with others
It’s easy to feel inadequate when we measure our own sense of success against the “success” we think we see in those around us. Now’s the time to be gentle with yourself, allowing yourself to be vulnerable with those in your life who could be nonjudgmental sources of empathy and support. Allow your significant other, family members, friends, and therapist to be here for you. Humans weren’t designed to live in a solitary vacuum, we were designed to seek and accept support from the community around us.
4. Commitment: Address your health needs
Stress can cause a weakened immune system which COVID-19 seems to prey on. It’s more important than ever that you commit to maintaining your physical and emotional wellness. If you’ve been laid off, contact your HR department immediately to clarify the final date of your current health insurance coverage. Options like COBRA or Covered California may be available to help you maintain health insurance. Before your insurance expires, refill any prescriptions that are running low and schedule any healthcare visits that you’ve been putting off. Finally, now may be the perfect time to build a daily self-care practice of meditation, exercise, and healthy eating.
5. Acceptance: Take breaks
Part of acceptance involves accepting the things you cannot change, and there are many repercussions of job loss that are beyond your control. It’s OK (and actually healthy) to “check out” from time to time. Watch some trashy reality TV, reread your favorite book, or dive deep into perfecting that sourdough recipe that’s previously seemed too daunting.
6. Commitment: Use the opportunity for growth
While much of unemployment is about “surviving”, every setback in life provides an opportunity for growth (though the opportunity may initially feel hidden). Try using websites like Kahn Academy or Coursera to learn a new skill that will make you more employable. Ask a friend to help you brush up on your interview skills, and consider conducting the mock interview over videochat to get comfortable with that format. Use this time to update and revise your resume, and consider asking a mentor or perhaps even your old supervisor to look it over and make suggestions.
Finally, remember the old adage, “This too shall pass.” Unemployment and the stress associated with it are both temporary, so when you’re ready, start applying to new jobs! Keep an open mind about the positions you’re applying for, what field those positions may be in, and where the job may be located. Part of your journey of growth may involve growing into a new job that you enjoy more than the one you’ve just lost.
Still feeling stressed?
Therapy can provide a safe space to process your feelings and explore new career opportunities.